Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Sex Sex and More Sex

I thought that headline would get your attention! On February 5th, I have a surprise for all of my loyal cyberpeeps! Rachel Greene Baldino and Judy Ford authors of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Enhancing Sexual Desire, will be guest bloggers on the Diary of the Two Date Diva! Save the date and surf on over next Tuesday and take advantage of the sexperts. Be sure to give them your feedback (I know you guys give GREAT feedback) and ask any questions that you might have.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Sometimes the Boys Need a Little Help

Thought this was a cute article on how to help a guy ask you out. Happy reading!

Saturday, January 26, 2008

The Question She Forgot To Ask

"I didn't know you actually had to ask a man if he was married. I figured if he was on a dating site and he asked you out on a date ,that singleness was, you know, implied." A woman standing in line for coffee at Borders spoke into her phone in a hushed but furious tone. I felt a pang of empathy for her and remembered how many times I 'd read similar things on message boards and advice columns for dating. Girl meets boy; girl and boy date for a while; the subject of exclusivity comes up and boy admits he is married or has a committed girlfriend. Girl is crushed and blames herself for not asking all the right questions. But is that a question anyone should have to ask? Shouldn't some things be implied in dating?

It reminds of me of a Sex and the City episode, where the characters decided that all men should come with a light, like on a taxi, that indicated whether or not that man was available. Should we all have those little lights on our heads? It would make it a lot easier to figure out if the hot guy in the produce department actually had a girlfriend. You could also tell if a guy was single from a hundred paces rather than having to sneak up and look for a ring or a tan line on the ring finger.

It seems that people view sins of omission as somehow less than actually coming out and outright lying. "But she never asked!" is the excuse some would use for not mentioning an existing relationship. When did these omissions become okay? Did I miss a memo?

I know there are plenty of questions that singles need to ask these days. For example, you should also have a conversation about STDs and testing before you hop in the sack. You should ask about your deal breakers (whatever those may be) before you get too invested in a person you are dating. However, is it now becoming necessary to ask about spouses and significant others too? Considering that many people are now getting caught in these situations where they find out about an existing relationship after they have been dating someone (and sometimes sleeping with them) for quite some time, maybe we should all add this to our list of questions to be asked before we hand over our heart to another person.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Are All the Good Ones Really Taken???

I found this article that I thought was very interesting. I know all singles have felt this way at one time or another. Have a great weekend!

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Tag! I'm IT...Well Sort of

1218 has tagged me to reveal a bit more about myself so here goes. Don't say you weren't warned.

The rules for this particular game:
-Link to the person who tagged you.
-Post the rules on your blog.
-Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
-Tag at least 3 people at the end of your post and link to their blogs.
-Let each person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

1. I don't like the food on my plate to touch either! (See 1218's tag post) I'm not fanatic about it, but I'd rather it not touch, except if it's bacon, eggs and grits; I like to mix those all together. I am officially a freak.

2. I have been the exact same size since I turned 15 years old. For some weird reason, I just stopped growing.

3. I once got so fed up with dating that I gave up men for Lent. (Stop laughing, it was harder than it sounds.)

4. I am a magnet for children and small animals. Babies and toddlers find me facinating and stare at me or follow me around no matter where I am , the grocery store or the doctor's office... everywhere. Dogs and cats (some that aren't even all that friendly) climb all over me. I'm like the Pied Piper, only I use my powers for good not evil.

5. My favorite food is sushi.

6. I hate shoes, if I could go bare foot or wear flip flops all the time, I would be the happiest girl ever.

I'm tagging:
Love ly Sa
Princess B

Monday, January 21, 2008

Random Thoughts on Love and Loss at 2 AM

Why am I up writing a post at 2 AM on a school night? Well, the short answer is that I had a headache and took medication; now I am wide awake. And my thoughts are running wild. A dangerous thing, I know.

I have been following SurferGrrl's ongoing struggle with letting go of a relationship that ended four months ago (to catch up go here). Her posts have gotten me thinking about my own struggles to let go of a relationship that lasted for five years that I thought would definitely end my single status for good. When it ended, I felt lost and confused and not sure what direction I should go. I mean, I thought I knew what I wanted and that he and I were on the same page. How could I have been so incredibly wrong? I asked myself this question so many times I can't even count.

I also asked why he didn't love me enough or why, when he had the chance, didn't he choose me? I remember how he used to tell me that he'd always felt like he'd left every girl he ever dated better than he found her, but that he felt like that I had made him better. And yet, he didn't choose me.

But slowly as time passed, I began to realize that I had always known what I wanted in a relationship and a marriage. I still want the same things. I've never wavered. My ex, Frat Boy, had known what I wanted too; we'd had many conversations about it. But I've come to realize that he also knew something that I didn't know and he couldn't say. He could never be the person to give me what I wanted and needed. He saw that, but in my blind love for him, I didn't see it. And sometimes on really lonely nights at 2 AM; I still don't.

However, in the quiet and solitude of this night, I view things a bit differently. His not choosing me was a gift. He knew he could never be the husband and partner that I deserved and the one thing that he did out of the love that he DID have for me was to let me go so that I could find someone that would be the kind of partner I need. He did love me enough, he loved me enough to let me go. And perhaps that was the best gift he could have ever given me. Because I will find that partner that I deserve and one day I'll be able to thank Frat Boy for having the insight and forethought that I didn't have.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Not So Average Recipe

This weekend, I decided to try out a recipe that AverageGirl posted on her blog for ribs made with a BBQ cola sauce. And Oh my God they were good. (If you are a vegetarian this would not be a recipe for you!) Anyway, I love to cook and I'm always looking for new recipes to try out when I have the time. So, I figured since it was going to be very cold here this weekend and I wouldn't be leaving the house much, I would give the ribs a try. It was a good idea, if I must say so myself.

I love ribs and I'd been craving them every since she made that post, but my problem has always been that I could never cook them the way I liked them. I love it when the meat is so tender that it literally falls off of the bone, but if you follow the recipe on the back of the BBQ sauce bottle, it just doesn't get them tender enough. So, I never cook them. However, this recipe got it just right. The ribs were so tender they practically melted in my mouth! So, surf on over and check out AverageGirl's not so average recipes. She's a darn good cook!

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Miracles and the Internet Gods

As I write this, a miracle is taking place. It's not a huge life altering miracle, but it is amazing non the less. I have wireless internet access, but yet I don't. Let me explain.

I had to relapce my wireless router this week and last night I couldn't get it to work so I called the tech support number. The first guy gave me instructions and told me to call back if it didn't work and the second person I talked with told me I would have to call my internet provider (Comcast) and get a new WAN IP address. Okay, no problems so far. As I waited on the phone to ask Comcast for a new IP, my WAN IP adress suddenly updated itself! (Miracle #1) I figured I might as well see if that fixed the problem and guess what? It did! So, here I am all connected and blogging away. But the really interesting thing is that my connection status says "not connected." Weird.

I don't know if I should thank Santa, Baby Jesus or the elusive Internet Gods, but if any of you are paying attention, um, thanks! I will keep blogging as long as the Internet Gods(or whoever) allow.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Taking the Meaning of Cheap Date to a Whole New Level

I am redefining Cheap Date on a daily basis. I have discovered that I can get a buzz just from drinking a cup of coffee and taking an Allegra-D sinus capsule. Here's hoping I don't get fired for being tipsy at work. ;)

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Don't Ask Don't Tell

Since AdventureGrrl (100 Days in Beds) enlightened me on using Site Meter to see how people got to my site, I have decided to institute a Don't Ask Don't Tell policy. Since I have a few offbeat titles on my posts (ie Squirrel Porn) I realized that if someone googles a bestiality website, it is possible that this post could pop up in a search. Oh. My. God.

So, all of my Cyberpeeps, if you did happen to surf in from a weird animal porn site, I won't ask about it if you don't tell. Because I don't want to know....really.

Instant Gratification

I found this posted on a message board and it sounds very interesting. I'm not sure how comfortable I would be doing it but it sounds exciting! (I'm a big 'ol chicken!) I guess for those of us who like instant gratification it could be a good thing. If any one would like to try it out and report back, I'd be happy to post about it.

Surfergrrl...SeeingSingle...any takers?

Crazy Blind Date

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Date Like Your Grandma

You know the more I think about it, my grandmother (affectionately referred to as "Nanny" by her grandchildren) had the right idea about dating. When I was a kid and would come home declaring my love for whoever the boyfriend of the moment was, she would lament about how silly it was for a young woman to have only one boy to date.

Nanny would always say, "In my day, a girl dated lots of boys at the same time. After a period of time she would narrow her field of suitors down to 2 or 3 that she really liked and then she would narrow it even further until she was engaged to someone. We certainly didn't limit ourselves to just one boy right off the bat!"

I think Nanny might have been on to something. So many times, women declare that they only want to date one guy at a time so they can focus on that man and see if the relationship has potential. However, many times, it turns out that the man they were focusing on was also focusing himself on several other women. Of course, the inevitable disappointment comes about when the relationship does not materialize. Where did women get the idea that dating more than one man at a time (especially when there is no relationship and a couple is in the getting to know each other stage) was a "bad" thing? Some woman (I have seen this on message boards) actually liken the practice of dating several guys to cheating. To which Nanny would have responded with a loud declaration of "Bull Hockey!"

Men certainly don't consider dating more than one woman at a time cheating so where did women get that idea? Are we afraid it will make us look like we're loose women of poor morals? That's crazy because people are way more open about these things today than in Nanny's hay day. So, I still don't understand how women have given all of their dating power over to men. But in the past 3 years, I've taken mine back and I intend to keep it!

I vow to continue to date like my grandma and date several guys at once and then narrow down my choices as I go. After all, having a choice is always empowering, not to mention it makes you the mistress of your own destiny. And I like the sound of that.

Monday, January 14, 2008

Life is Good

Have you ever had an experience or an encounter with someone and you walked away thanking your lucky stars that you didn't have their life? Well, I've been having this experience over and over in the past few weeks. I'm not sure if the Universe decided that I need to be reminded that I have I have a pretty great life or what, but man, if that's the case, I get it already!

My inner Pollyanna had a couple of pity parties during the last few weeks, but she bounced back pretty quickly, especially when people in much worse circumstances started crawling out of the woodwork. From acquaintances in horrible marriages or dire financial straits to people coming down with life altering illnesses, looking around, my life looks damn good from pretty much every angle. I have begun to walk around saying "thank you" to the Universe all day long because I am painfully aware that it could be so much worse. It reminds me of the old saying "I complained of my shoes until I met a man with no feet."

Yep, no matter what, life is good.

Is it Real?

I found this article that I thought was pretty interesting. It gives a few good pointers on deciding if what you feel is real love or perhaps something else... like desperation. I can say that I've had this conversation with myself on more than one occasion and sometimes it ain't a pretty one. Enjoy!

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Two Date Diva Hits 50!

...posts, I mean. This is the 50th post and for some strange reason I felt the need to celebrate with a big Woooo Hoooo!

You may now go back to your regularly scheduled cyber surfing activities.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Bein' Good To Me in the New Year

I don't usually make New Year's resolutions because I believe you can resolve to change your life on any old given Tuesday, but this year, I did decide to make more time for one thing. I'm going to make sure I meditate at least once every day.

I know that meditation is good for me and I know that my life is so much less stressful when I do it regularly, but much like exercise is for some people, when life gets hectic for me, my meditation ritual goes out the window. Rather than get up 30 minutes earlier so I can meditate in the morning, I will sleep in and hit the snooze one more time ensuring that I don't have time to perform my meditation and make it to work on time.

Interestingly enough, intention is a very powerful thing. I meditated for about 20 minutes last night before bed (I even stayed up late to make time for it). And even though I went to bed late, this morning I woke up a full 45 minutes before the alarm went off because I'd made a deal with myself to meditate this morning before work. Not only did I wake up early, but I'm not even sleepy (okay, caffeine helps, but I have that everyday).

I'll keep you all posted on how being good to myself works out, I mean it can't be bad for me, right? So my challenge to all of you (my cyberpeeps) is this...take the time to do one thing every day that is good for yourself and then if you like, you can post it here in the comments and let us know how it's going!

(Side note: New Two Date Diva word of the day is Cyberpeeps (short for Cyberpeople) which is used in reference to all of my new friends and blogging buddies out in cyber space.)

Friday, January 4, 2008

Friday Riddle

How many completely sober people does it take to figure out how to put down the driver side window in a rental car at a DUI checkpoint? Apparently it takes three. I know from experience.

Colorado Beth and her boyfriend (affectionately referred to as The Hippie) came to stay with me over the weekend. They had a funeral and a wedding to attend and I provided lodging. Last Friday night we had to go back to the airport to get their luggage that had arrived on a very late flight from Denver. However, upon driving to said airport we encountered a DUI checkpoint. No problem we were all completely sober. But apparently that did not make any of us any smarter. Oh no, as we were in the line driving up to the first officer, we were frantically trying to figure out which button would put down the driver side window on the rental car.

The Hippie and I were locking and unlocking the doors, Colorado Beth was moving all of the side mirrors. No windows budged an inch and we were running out of buttons to fiddle with.

"Great!" Colorado Beth said. "They're going to think we're all so hammered we can't let down a damn window!" Finally she opened the door and spoke to the officer and he sent us down to the next officer. Colorado Beth looked very nervous. I was laughing hysterically. The Hippie was still locking and unlocking the doors.

Just as we were driving up to the officer that we were sure was going to have us get out and walk the line, I noticed a couple of buttons on the console. I pushed one and low and behold the driver side window descended. I laughed hysterically again, I'm sure the officer thought I was drunk or crazy, but it didn't matter because Colorado Beth was driving.

They checked CB's license and we were on our way. But I couldn't help laughing at how three adults (completely sober) couldn't figure out how to work the car windows. I'm sure if we'd all been drunk, the task would have been accomplished much easier.

Thursday, January 3, 2008

A Colorado Beth Classic

Colorado Beth on needing a boyfriend:

"I have my own balls, I just need to rent a penis every now and again."

Classic. Can you see why I hang out with this girl?

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Happy New Year!

I hope that each of you has an amazing new year! I also want to thank all of you for reading my ramblings and making my 2007 absolutely awesome. 2007 will be tough to beat, but I think that 2008 is going to be a pretty great year.